hanging my dreams under my bed.



hi. um, just feel like writing something tonight.
its a week before UN test.
its a week before my high school reach its final lessons.
and i went to an education expo today.
with lots of private universities promoting their majors, programs, etc etc.

i dont get the excitements.
really, have i lost my will to go to college? :(
maybe it was because my mum banned me from going to jakarta fr college, i dunno.
it just feels like all my jumping hoping for college life is dropped to the bottom of my dream.

seeing all my friends, so certain with their future.
ahh i envy them so much :)
happy too, well if i am to play a good role of their career counselor.
some r going to jakarta, some singapore, some really far like OZ, and some pretty near (inside the town).
i can see someday on my twenties i’ll regret  the decision i made: staying in medan.

honestly, i don’t see anything wrong with going and pursuing my dream.
wait, there IS something wrong.

if i insist to get what i want, i’ll practically hurt mum, thats the edge of my decisions.
so i dont know how to deal with things happening for my future.
let’s just hope things turns out good for everybody.
i dont expect too much, and i dont hang my dreams as high as before.
it will eventually fly beyond my hand.

-dilemma.confusion.devastation.BANG.

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